This week, many in the tech world are starting to grapple with the responsibility of the AI products we've created. OpenAI is being sued for its chatbot encouraging a kid to commit suicide.

My heart broke when I saw the messages. And how a tool designed to validate and amplify your own beliefs and values could be used to push someone over the edge.

Reading those notes, I thought,

Why are you asking a computer?
Go to your parents,
your family,
Someone who loves you!

This thing is a siren leading you to your death.

My son is still in preschool. He's not at risk for this kind of thing, but I am thinking that this is the world we're shaping for him.

As tech and AI become more mainstream, schools are starting to find ways to use them effectively. I wonder what I would tell my son about AI?

  • Would I tell him to run from it?
  • Would I tell him to dive in?
  • Would I teach him how it works?
  • Would I teach him how to make it work for him?

If I could teach my son one thing.

Again, he's in preschool. I don't have to worry about him using AI to cheat on his assignments. (He's not outsourcing playtime to anyone.) I am already seeing teachers and schools roll it out in their curriculum planning, their weekly notes, and everyday tasks that once seemed clumsy but human, now sound like something out of a PR firm.

My focus right now is for him to know people, understand people, and if you're lucky, find friends you can ride and fly with together.

Any school that gets in the way of that is not a school I want my son to be part of.

Value People

As far as I can remember, school has always been a place where you learn things, get tested for it, and survive the social jungle of recess or hallways.

Over time, it seems the collective focus has moved to passing tests, meeting quotas, and building a resume to get into college.

Now, as a parent, I know that passing tests is important, but playing nice with others is just as valuable, if not more so, these days.

AI fits the test-taking, achievement model well. Those are concrete problems with known solutions. So students using AI for tests and assignments makes sense. And when the priorities are to get an A using AI is a no brainer.

But what does that A mean?

(More on that later.)

The more we care, the more we're connected.

There are a lot of lessons I learned in my time in school and college. While academic achievement was the stated goal, my peers and professors were the people who brought me joy.

It wasn't just having a purpose. But a shared purpose that made hard tests easier, impossible classes fun, and friends who have your back in good and bad times.

After college, making friends gets harder. Going into the corporate world, you do meet people and have shared goals. But I found that making connections after school is very different.

To this day, I'm still connected with some friends, but it'll never be like college.

And that's ok.

I had two choices in front of me. Let people drift away or find community in other places. Find hobbies, volunteer, and walk the city.

I've done both.

The less we care, the less we're connected.

Walking this path was easy, but dangerous. Life got boring, repetitive, and numb.

People were around me, but I didn't know anyone, and few knew me. I also didn't care to meet people.

"Too much hassle"
"I'm weird, and they'll think I'm weird."
"I'm only here for a few months, no need to grow roots here."

The excuses kept coming.

Losing those connections leaves you alone.

I was the hero of my own story. Other voices around me were at best background noise.

While others may try to connect with you, if you don't connect with others, then it's like they aren't there in the first place.

And the longer you're in this state, the harder it'll be to connect when you want to. You've lost your muscle to reach out to others.

If you are the only person in your mind,
you've lost what it means to be human.

This is why AI in its current state is a problem. It allows you to have an outside voice mirror and validate your inside voice. Now we have an echo chamber pointing us wherever the wind blows.

And sometimes there are scary chills in the air.

It becomes easy to justify anything because you're accountable to only yourself. And you don't want to reach out because, right now, you are the only one who exists.

Humanity is a social invention that requires at least one other person to acknowledge its existence. If you find yourself the only one in your existence, then congrats.

You've lost your humanity.

So don't trade being correct for being you.

I'll end with this. (A bit lighter tone, I promise)

Let's go back to what it means to get an A in this new world.

If the A stands for a single, defined, correct answer. An AI can comb over countless articles, studies, books, and journals to get you what you need. If the A means identifying and connecting with the teacher, AI has resources on that to help you say the right thing at the right time.

If that's an A, so be it.

I believe we are on a journey. One hopefully full of joy, adventure, friends, and purpose. If my answer falls short of the world's "A" standards, so be it. That's where I am now.

  • I'll change
  • I'll learn
  • I'll grow

And in a few more years, I may come to a different answer. But it'll be my answer, one forged by my life's experiences with the people around me.

And one I can share with others going down similar paths.

Both the destination and the journey help make us human.

If at first you don't succeed, try again. It's an old and sometimes annoying lesson.

But there are two treasures in that saying.

Succeed and Try
Goal and Journey

Right now, I'm trying to teach a toddler how to try.

Try, and not to give up.

Our friends, families, teachers, and mentors help teach us this lesson.

And with that, humanity keeps growing.